Jake: The human butt is really just a big chunk of muscle.

me: Well, not for everyone. For some people it is just a big chunk of fat.

Jake: No, it’s like on a chicken, most of the muscle is concentrated in the breast area. On humans most of the muscle is in the butt. There’s some good eatin’ back there.

me: You should never eat people. Some things are more shameful than dying. Even if we were freezing and you died first, I would not eat you.

Jake: Well if I was starving I would probably go cannibal.

me: <gasp> YOU MEAN IF I DIE FIRST YOU WOULD EAT ME??!??!? It’s a good thing I have more fat on my body; I’m likely to live longer.